So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
It's called 'beer pong' not 'everclear and coke pong' for a reason...
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
