And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
Randomize
