so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
