shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
bring money and cleavage
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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