You're a womanizer and a bitch.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
I feel like I owe her child an apology or something after blowing my load on the tattoo she has of her.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
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