So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
Randomize
