4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
Bisexual people are plain selfish.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him
at least he gets points for a creative booty call
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
