She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
It's taking every bit of my restraint not to go to the store and buy chips and cake and like steal someone's dog. PMS is so weird.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
