how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
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