I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
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We talked him into tasing himself.
He was taking the condom off and he turns to me and says, "You know how snakes can shed their skin?"
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
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The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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