I'm a simple man, with a social life most psychopaths would cringe at
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I only want to come over for sex and blueberry pancakes
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
