If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
My sister was crawling her way home and kept asking us to carry her,then she insisted on grabbing at our ankles til she passed out, how was your night?
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
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