Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
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