Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
It's an open bar on a yacht... I'm going to drown.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
