the police officer looked at my vomit and told me "milk was a bad choice"
32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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