it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
She walked home carrying a six pack of beer and someone elses cat
SHE BETTER HAVE BROUGHT BACK MY FUCKING COUCH CUSIONS OR SHES GUNNA GET IT.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
