12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
There's a creepy homeless guy with no hand trying to get up on our tacobell order
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
Everyone here is taking crazy amounts of mescaline and I'm just over here like hey have you tried the pretzel rolls mmm
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
Thank you for coming with me today. I find it appropriate that we celebrated my negative pregnancy test with slurpees and donuts.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
Randomize