I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
It's okay I missed my booty call by two whole minutes so I decided to delete him from my phone and then re-add him as "I am a douchelord"
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
