I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
she left with her roommate. or at least i think she did. but i also just thought i ate candy corn but i'm hal convinced it was candle wax.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
Okay. So my choices are the sleeping Guy who looks about twelve and a man that looks like he was the original sandman. Im gonna need a beer for this......
I never notice how majestic and beautiful my cat is unless I'm blazed
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I need to keep a secret stash of instant alcoholic margaritas for when i deal with people. For example, right now, im grading, and I just don't fucking care any more. My students should make a thank you card for Jose Cuervo.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
Randomize
