Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize