started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
sorry there isn't a 'perfect ass' emoji
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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