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• (734): View more from Michigan

  just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"

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• (760): View more from California

  O no, u 2 are dating again?

  (503): View more from Oregon

  No. I just masturbate furiously to his picture

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• (925): View more from California

  You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain

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• (631): View more from New York

  By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (847): View more from Illinois

  We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."

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• (408): View more from California

  You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now

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• (907): View more from Alaska

  She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?

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• 

  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (507): View more from Minnesota

  I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.

  (1-507): View more from Minnesota

  We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.

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• (216): View more from Ohio

  Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played

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• (703): View more from Virginia

  Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine

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• (407): View more from Florida

  Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.

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