school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
These Are 23 Of The Most Uncomfortable Questions You Can Ask
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
Just got blown in a rental car. I need to get rear ended more often
You tried to put a condom on my dog, then he ate it.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
The 17 Most Horrible Things Said To Online Daters
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
He's rapping about a turtle neck sweater. Please come get me.
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day