He is an equal opportunity slut.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
What happened to "I wouldnt even touch her with a ten foot pole"?
Her vagina devoured it.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
My girlfriend is pregnant with her exs baby. 2014 just became the worst year
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
Coming straight to your house after the flight. If not in Federal Prison for disobeying peanut laws.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Randomize
