Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
he's really high and upset. he just found out alice from the brady bunch died
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
But I think I successfully seduced her with my alias.
Randomize
