if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is a mass text. I will facerape you if you bring me Fierce Melon Gatorade and 4 D batteries.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
There is nothing worse then the feeling after you've held in farts all night..
What's his name?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
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