i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I can hear the pillow talk now, "how many condoms did you bring? Good, put them all on,"
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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