I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Softest bathroom rug I've slept on in my life, there have been many
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
THEY WILL NOT STOP FLINGING CARDS AROUND THE ROOM! It has been four hours. HOW CAN IT STILL BE ENTERTAINING?!?! I will be under the table if you need me.
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