And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
You don't understand, alcohol has become a thing of survival for me and without it I can't function as a normal human being
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
Randomize
