Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
Dont worry about the blood on the pillow. its from my face.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
He just got home after serving 5 years in prison. And I think I may courtesy fuck him. Best Christmas present ever.
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