Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I understand why you refuse to be sober now
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
i could have got laid, but instead, i threw up in her hair. you can cross that off the bucket list.
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