chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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