you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
