I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
most of the afternoon was spent sneaking around my house and alternating which bathrrom to throw up in.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Just do it. I grew some lady balls and did it last year. It's your turn. Time to show what you're made of. Hit it or quit it.
Also. Picked being late to work over the maid finding my vibrator. Life choices....
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
