Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
but im not going to tell the owner of the penis of my dreams how to wear his hair.
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
woke up with 8 used magnum condoms bound together by floss around my neck, thats about all im gonna tell you.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
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