I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
Just got done fucking the squirter chick. She came when we were in a 69. I now know what it's like to be water boarded.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Alright whatever you say... But in the future when you really wish you had a dildo don't come crying to me about it.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
So I remember having an orgasm, but I didn't wake up next to anyone. Your dog is afraid of me. Is this a sick joke?
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