After he came all over my face, he proceeded to give me a high five. I can't even act upset because I always put myself in these situations. Did I mention D3: Mighty Ducks was playing in the background?
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He was waring a speedo fashioned out of american flag bandanas and when he got hard he said "you're such a patriot...raising the american flag like that"
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
you bleached my bangs. i have an interview later today and you assholes bleached my bangs.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Dude, the T Swift concert might not be so bad after all. Can you say milfs living vicariously through their teenage daughters? Score.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
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