I think we should go ahead and pin a note to my shirt when we go out that says"do NOT buy me shots"
On the back we can put possible side effects may include: indiscriminate making out, brief crying spells, yelling in jibberish, and sudden sleep.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
It's like god touched my soul and said 'you will be great in bed'
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
Randomize