We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
We didn't have a blender so we made the margaritas by running over a garbagebag full of ice with the car and then stirring it with a knife in a French-press coffee pot. CAN YOU SAY RESOURCEFUL?
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
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