I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I've got to stop giving the gift of vagina for every occasion. I'm exhausted.
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
I just want to make out with him forever
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
And then she grabbed my dick and started singing 'ring ring ring ring banana phone'
Randomize
