I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Just looked for hours for the remote. Found it in my purse. I need to drink less.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
