he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
she worked me into her spring break cardio plan. im mondays and wednesdays.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
Me too...I'm driving to work trying to figure out if I put my pants on the right way.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
FUCK WHALES
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
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