ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
I woke up sandwiched between them, all of us naked, and they were just sharing a cigarette, a donut, and the paper like it was just some normal post-threesome Sunday brunch.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
we got cockblocked by his mom again...its like she has a radar on me
please stop trying to sleep with him
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
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