He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
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