the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
i ordered 12 mcnuggets at mcdonalds and ended up getting 20. for free. miracles really do happen when your high.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
I don't want to be "that guy" but I may have accidentally sent a dick pic to your mom
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
He took home that trashy slut from Bama but a NFL Lineman was just in my DMs so... who’s the real winner here
Randomize
