I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I want sex. When is an appropriate time post funeral to ask for something like that. Like when it gets dark out?
Randomize
