My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
Please come back. She just stuck her bloody band-aid to Zach's face, has a fire extinguisher, and is talking about tornados hiding.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
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