I will die if light touches me.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize
