That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
I couldn't drown my sorrows in an ocean of jack daniels. They may have scuba gear.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I DID NOT GO INTO HOURS OF STRENUOUS LABOR FOR YOU TO LOOK LIKE A DOMINATRIX BARMAID ON A WEEKDAY. AT LEAST SAVE IT FOR THE WEEKEND GDI.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
my personal favorite... An "I'm sorry you broke your finger and cant play sports for awhile" blowjob!
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