My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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