something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
The beer is more important than you right now.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
If you have a glass table... Put it up. I don't wanna hurt myself again, I just got my stitches out...
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
It just makes me feel nauseous. And I don't want to feel nauseous when all I really want is to get off.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
Oh, I also stabbed a guy Friday and he still asked me out
I'm going to smell of sex and shame.
How is that different than any other Monday night?
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
Randomize
